Garud Puran punishments and a Software Engineer

Inspired by the movie Anniyan(Aparichit in Hindi) I searched google and found out a list of punishments from the Garud Puran given to sinners. I had a weird idea of linking all these punishments to the wrong things we do in our lives. To my surprise, lot of punishments are applicable even to a common man. Some of the punishments are harsh and very sick to read. I have taken some of the punishments very seriously and some of them very lightly. Its upto you how you handle it.

Anthakuubam :

Those who murder pious people and those who cheat divine ones will be sent here. This place is a well filled with dangerous animals, insects, birds & snakes. These creatures will endlessly torture the sinners till their sentence is over.

For Software Engineer : Software Engineers who produce fake permanent address proof in order to get a driving licence, open a DMAT account. will have to face Anthakuubam. 

Kirumibohjanam 

Those who eat food without offering to God will take the form of worms and other worms at this place will bite them. 

For Software Engineer : Software Engineers take food from the cafeteria. If you don't finish whatever is in your plate, You will have to suffer. I don't offer food to God, But I don't waste food either. So I think, I am spared :-) Remember, Never ever waste food. Its YOU who took take the food by your hand, and its YOU who is throwing the same food in the dustbin. 

Pandri Mugam

Those rulers/kings who sentence others unjustly and those who torture the weak old people will be sent here. This place looks like a pig's face. Here the keepers of hell will break the sinners' arms and legs. Their bodies will be squeezed in between rollers like sugar cane. At such moment, the sinners will faint without realizing it.

For Software Engineer : You are not a king. But being rude to the security man if he insists you to display your badge, blaming the bus driver for traffic jams, paying no respect to the cleaning staff.......welcome to the place that looks like a pig's face.

Thaamisrum

Those who steal others' wife, property or children will be terribly beaten up by the keepers of hell. The continuous torture will make them semi-conscious, overcome by greater fear and tremendous pain.

For Software Engineer :  At least I am not eligible. Married techies, think yourselves.

Annatha Thamisrum

Those who deceive their life partners by not offering them food, will be tortured here till they look like a lifeless tree. They are made blind for their sins.

For Software Engineer : Again, I am spared. 

Rauravam 

Those who take away others' property by their cunning speech and those who destroy other families for their own happiness will die as pauper. In hell, those affected by him will take a cruel form then a poisonous snake to punish him. Such sinners will be held in Maha Rauravam till their sentence ends.

For Software Engineer : Troubling the landlord, Not paying the rent on time. Preparing fake rental agreements, duplicating the landlord's signature. You can suffer !

Kumbibaagam 

Those who do cruelty to birds and animals and those who eat their meat will be pushed into a pot of boiling oil. They will be in it for countless years.

For Software Engineer : Most of us will suffer this punishment. Eating Chicken, Mutton, Fish everything is counted ! 

Kalasuthiram 

Those who chase their parents away will be brought here. This is a place of fire and tremendous heat. Sinners will suffer internally and externally. They will not be given food or water. At such stage, they will be walking, standing and rolling on the floor with great pain.

For Software Engineer : Software Engineers who don't know the value of money they earn. Instead of sending sufficient money to their parents, spend it on drinks and cigarette, movies, hotels, and other unnecessary stuffs. Not obeying what their parents say, Fall in love with a colleague, and marry her without their parents permission, This punishment is for you.

Asibathiram

Those who convert to other religions without a good reason will be brought into this forest with sharp knife like leaves. They will be beaten with sharp edge belts. Those running away from them will suffer more cuts from such leaves and stones. Moreover, they will be cut into pieces continuously till their sentence ends.

For Software Engineer:  The words are clear enough to be applicable to all software engineers. 

Saaramehyaathanam 

Those who burned down houses or poison others, those who do mass murders and politicians who destroy countries will be held here. They will be fed on dog meat and in return more than 700 dogs will bite them before they are freed.

For Software Engineer :  More than Software engineers, Politicians need to worry.

Ahvisi 

Those who do good services for mere publicity will be brought to the top of high place or hill to be pushed down. The hard surface/ground will shatter their bodies into pieces. The hell keepers will gather the bodies together to repeat such punishment again.

For Software Engineer : Those who study for CAT in the office, use office material for personal use. Come to office on weekends just to create a monster.com / naukri.com account and claim overtime and eat pizza. Beware.

Paribaathanam 

The drunkards will be sent here. They will be given boiling iron liquid to drink.

For Software Engineer :  I am spared here too ! Most of the software engineers will face this. 

Shaarargartham

Those who disregard other qualified ones or holy ones and those who boasts about themselves while insulting other capable people will brought here. They will be hanged up side down, beaten and tortured by the keepers. 

For Software Engineer :  Every word is applicable for every software engineer.

Rashohganam 

Those who do human or animal sacrifices in Yagna and those who eat their meat will be brought here. Those killers will be turned to animals and those animals or others killed by them will take human forms. They will tear them apart and eat up their flesh and drink their blood.

For Software Engineers : You will be rewarded with either Kumbibaagam or Rashohganam. Anyways you have to suffer. I am sure I will get Kumbibaagam.

Suulapurohtham 

Those who cheat the innocents who trusted them and those who commit suicide by hanging or piercing the trident into their body will be brought here. Tridents and birds with sharp beaks, will pierce them as punishment.

For Software Engineers : Switching jobs just for a higher pay, Applying for jobs in other companies using fake experience, Producing fake medical bills, showing fake bank balance in order to approve a loan. Suulapurotham is waiting for you !

Vadaarohtham

Those who torture animals or other creatures staying in caves, valleys and webs will be sent here. They will be placed in smoky pits, fire pits and punished by poison.

For Software Engineers : Dont know whether this punishment is valid for torturing cocroaches, mice, lizards etc. If yes, I am afraid, no one is spared.

Paryaavaathanagam 

Those who murmur to themselves by cursing their superiors while having their meals will be sent here. Crows and eagles will poke such sinner's eyes till their eyeball drop off.

For Software Engineers : The description is clear enough. cursing your managers, piers during your meals. Discussing how you can take revenge, teach him a lesson, how you can shock them by your resignation. Every small detail is counted.

Susimugam 

Those who become arrogant about their wealth, those who show hatred to the poor, those who bury or protect their wealth with 'genies' guarding it and those who refuse to return the money borrowed from others will be brought here. Such sinners will be tied with ropes and their bodies will be cut into pieces.

For Software Engineers : This a similar punishment is already given by banks if the loan is not repaid in time :-) Software Engineers who borrow money from their colleagues in order to buy a bike, laptop, land, flat etc. and not return it in time, Producing fake documents in order to save tax, all such deeds are counted for Susimugam. 

Agni goodam 

Those who take away others' things by force will be sent to this chimney like place to be barbecued continuously.

For Software Engineers : Those who download songs, movies, and other high volume stuff, watching youtube videos during office hours, you are not aware, you are stealing others bandwidth by force. 

Vajra goondam 

Those who have illegal affairs will be forced to hug burning rods while been whipped.

For Software Engineers : Beware. Thats all I can say :-)

Sunmaali 

Those who flirt will be poked with spiked weapons.

For Software Engineers : All weekend lovers. Visiting malls, parks, gardens just for the sake of "bird watching". Very common !

Vaitharani 

Those who offend the 'shastraas' will be pushed into the river filled with blood, pus, flesh, fats, hairs, bones, urine and bowels. They will be bitten till they bleed by the creatures dwelling in it. The sinners will struggle helplessly unable to reach the shore. 

For Software Engineers : In order to offend the shastraas, first of all you need to know them. Anyways, you will be pushed.

Pooyohtham 

Those who neglect their culture, those who have illicit affairs with low status women, those who misbehave without self-discipline and those who neglect the right way of living so as to live like free birds or animals will be brought here to eat bowels and to drink blood, urine and pus. 

For Software Engineers : These sins are mostly committed when in college. Doesn't matter, if you've done it, you will be punished.

Prinarohgam 

Those Brahmans who rear dogs and donkeys and use them for hunting will become targets for arrows shot by the keepers. 

For Software Engineers : Those techies who used ready made code copied from the Internet and use it in your programs claiming it as yours, get ready for some target practice.

Visasnum

The keepers will whip those who sacrifice cows for the sake of pride.

For Software Engineers : ???

Laalaapasham

Those who force their wives into unhealthy sex performance will be drowned into a pot of sperm forcing them to drink it.

For Software Engineers : No Comments.

These are just few of the punishments from the Garud Purana. I am not 100% sure of the genuinity of the punishments. I have copied the punishments from here. Even if you have committed some (or rather most) of the sins, there is always time to remorse. Be good to yourself. Be good to others. Or else Mr. Aparichit will give you one of the punishments for sure !